POV

Blogger Penelope Trunk on why she tweeted about her recent miscarriage...  The tweet that caused some brouhaha went as follows: "I'm in a board meeting. Having a miscarriage. Thank goodness, because there's a fucked-up three-week hoop-jump to have an abortion in Wisconsin."

Some people say that a miscarriage is too private to discuss at work. But why? It's an important part of a woman's experience. It is not dirty or evil or shameful. A large number of women will have miscarriages in their lifetime. It's part of being a woman. And most men at the office have lived through the miscarriage of a significant other. It's an experience that happens over weeks, not hours. And it happens at work. We talk about death at work. We talk about violence at work. We talk about emotional problems such as breakups and mishaps and major disappointments. Why can't we talk about miscarriage?

Who is hurt by keeping the topic taboo? Others say I should not have discussed my experience on Twitter, but Twitter is not a public forum. Those who want to read my tweets have to sign up to receive my updates. And I can approve or disapprove people on an individual basis. The percentage of people who subscribe to my Twitter feed who were offended by my miscarriage tweet is very small. I know because you can unsubscribe to the feed, and only about 70 did. I believe that the history of women can be seen, in some ways, as a history of language. The more women talk about their experiences, the more power they have to shape those experiences. Words such as date rape and antenatal depression are empowering because they give us ways to talk about issues that were hidden when we did not have the language to express them. We have a word for miscarriage. We should use it to explore the complicated issues around it.